i say things like.. music is my life.. i would die without music.. i love music.. many people think this means i am some kind of a musician.. "oh what do you play?" is usually what people say when i make that comment. i can play a little piano? is what i say. i wish i could play more piano.. but i didnt appreciate my mom giving me piano lessons when i was a kid. i just wanted to go play outside.. not play the piano. my mom is an amazing piano player [although she would never admit that. so ill say it for her.] i think i have an appreciation for classical because of my mother. if she sees a piano, she will want to play it.. i mean, me too.. but im not good.
one memory that i have is from va beach,, we were staying in a hotel and in the lobby-area there was a grand piano sitting there.. nobody was around, so my mom started playing fur elise. [which is one of my favorite songs] i wish i could play piano.. or be able to sit down and just play one song.
i have literally no musical talent. i mean nothing. i have tried to learn piano & guitar to no avail. when i was young, i was halfway decent at the piano.. i just wish i wasnt such an annoying kid, and maybe i wouldve stuck with it. world champion "hide and seeker" isnt exactly a talent... i mean, i guess it would be a good talent to have if i was in immediate danger and needed to hide.. but how often does that happen??? [answer: i have never used my hide and seek skills ever.. unless i was playing hide and seek.. which i haven't done since i was a kid.]
BUT i would be so empty without music. i LOVE to sing. i really do. i CANT sing. i really cannot. when i am by myself, i am not as guarded so i can sing much better.. but as soon as someone comes around, i get embarrassed. i dont want anyone to know that i cant sing. it really makes me sad. [lol] i love music.. and i love to sing along with my favorite songs.. but its just terrible. im sitting here right now listening to my ipod (like i do every night..) and Almost Paradise came on [call me lame, i LOVE that song\.] and it came to the part.. ill try to type it out.. where mike reno & ann wilson go "OhhHhHH ALMOST PAAARADISSEEE!" and that is my absolute favorite part of the song. i had to mouth the words, because daniel is sitting in front of me playing a game [MAG, and yes, he has the headset on.]
when i worked at publix, it was aweosme.. i would put one headphone on, and jam all night long. i mean.. really belt it out.. nobody could hear me.. theres no audio on the cameras, so its not like they could rewatch it and put it on youtube.. so i could really just have a good time.. when i'm home alone in the apartment? i have a hard time singing.. because i dont want anyone walking past the apartment to think that someone is being physically assaulted to the tune of "before he cheats." because thats probably what it sounds like. i cant sing with the stereo on.. i have to have my headphones on.. to drown out my own voice.
my entire life i have been told "turn your volume down, its not good to have something that loud next to your ears.." but honestly, i have to drown the sound of me singing out.. i think that might be why i think i'm such an awesome singer... because i have no idea if im even on pitch. but as soon as i get into a house.. game over. im going to go crazy singing. it makes me work faster, and it takes my mind off of whatever boring cleaning i'm doing. i would like to have a job where i could do laundry and iron all day.. in a room all by myself.. just me my ipod and an iron [what a TERRIBLE JOB!!! LOL] lets jsut say.. i'd like a job where i can work in a room all by myself and listen to my own music all day and sing. as another small quirk of mine.. i usually only sing "guy" songs around other people.. because i'm a girl and it will naturally sound bad when i sing it. lol.
moving on. my ipod is almost full. which is really sad, because i have 7 GB to fill up with music.. and i have managed to do it. i have pretty much every genre of music on my ipod [even a few country songs.. INSANITY.] and i know almost all the words to all the songs on my ipod.. i have 7GB of my mind taken up with music. this is not good. perhaps something useful could be in my brain, instead its just music lyrics.. i mean.. thats my talent. i cant sing them.. but i know all the words. i think i'm one of the most annoying people to ride with in a car.. because if you turn it to 97.1 or 96 rock.. im pretty sure i'll know what song is playing... and i know all the words.. it was like that at work too.. i knew almost every song on "publix radio.." so i would sing along while i was blocking or whatever.. and everyone was just like.. wow.... thats .... really ... sad. i have always been like that.. as a child, i knew all the words to Janie's Got a Gun [yeah, i can appreciate the irony of my dad teaching me that song too.]
i just really wish i could sing better. i would like to be one of those people that can sing right in the middle of a crowd of people.. and instead of people looking at me like i am tone deaf.. they would applaud.. not because i want to be famous [i do NOT.] i just wish my love for music would translate into my singing. i would rather just put a hat in front of me and sing rather than be a famous singer. fame is overrated, but thats an entirely different subject.
alas, i wont be taking voice lessons anytime soon.. [ever] but i'll keep on singing.. i know that "practice makes perfect" but i've been singing since i was a little kid.. and i am so far from perfect. so... hmm.
favorites things to listen to at the moment:
1. bridge over troubled water : simon & garfunkle
2. almost paradise : mike reno & ann wilson
3. anything by lady gaga
4. anything by the carpenters [superstarrrr!! i love karen carpenter.. she had an amazing voice. thats who i would like to sound like.]
5. Aerosmith
6. i still really love before he cheats. that song is a plus.
7. im on a "crappy 90s music" fix right now. so, its back to listening to grunge and/or pop music from the 90s.
WELL. i'll keep loving music no matter how crappy i sound.. i'll just keep turning the volume up.
xoxo
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